FRom humorlabs.com:
The Top 16 Election Day Cocktails
Mudslinger
Non-Consensual Sex on the Beach
Pina Clintada: coconut, pineapple, and $250K for access to the bartender
Orange Whine Cooler
The Jill Beer Stein: a "germ"-in beer stein filled with penicillin
Slow Uncomfortable Grope Against the Wall
Mai-Tais to Wall Street
The Greatest: just toilet water, but believe me, everyone is saying it will be beautiful, the best cocktail you ever tasted
BenghaZima
The Gary Johnson: you'll forget your troubles, foreign leaders, war zones...
Margarita (that Mexico will pay for!)
The Campaign Promise: an empty glass
White Russian Who Got a Meeting With the Secretary of State Because He Contributed to Her Foundation
Bloody Megyn
Screwedover: orange juice with lots of bitters
And the Number One Election Day Cocktail…
Pervy Wallbuilder
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The Honorable Mentions: De-pourables
Basket of Deplorables: Drop a shot of Jager into a pint of warm PBR. Drink quickly. Repeat.
Faulty Dog
Groppa
Salty Horndog
Sex on the Reach
Snow Job
Stop and Frisky Sour
Tequila Mockingturd: shot of Cuervo followed by a Trump impression
The Donald: orange juice, Absolut moron, bitters
The Election Choice Special: A Bloody Hillary and a chaser of women
The Trump Tower: just like a Manhattan, except you double the bitters and use urine instead of whisky
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So it took 2 months to recover?
How many therapeutic coloring books did you go through?