Tasteless but still funny

I’m not much of a clubber, but I was starting to get the hang of it.

They played “Jump Around” and I jumped around, they played “Put Your Hands Up” and I did, everything seemed to be going well.

Then they played “Come On Eileen” and I got thrown out…

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There’s an incest competition in my town this weekend.
I’m going to enter my sister.

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Woman walks into a butcher shop.

“Sir are your chickens fresh?”

“Freshest in town madam.”

“Let me see one.”

Butcher hands her a chicken. She spreads the legs puts her nose down in there and sniffs.

“Doesn’t smell that fresh to me”

“Lady, could you pass that test?”

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My penis was in the Guiness book of world records…
But then the librarian kicked me out

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Why can’t dyslexic people tell jokes?

Because they always punch up the fuck line.

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I refused to believe I was gay and dyslexic.
I was in Daniel.

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How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.

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Don’t you hate it when you’re driving along smoking a cigarette, you flick it out the window and you drive for a couple more miles and smell something funny and you look over onto the back seat and sure enough…
Grandma’s fingering herself again.

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https://cdn-webimages.wimages.net/05093c701c75b115435314212ca3c82a86b71c-wm.jpg?v=3

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Whoa!

I had a breakthrough today and got in touch with my inner self.
That’s the last time I use cheap toilet paper.

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My dad was so Competitive that on his death bed, as he breathed his last
He said, "Staring contest… GO.”

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HAHAHA! That has EVERYTHING!

You say that like it was a GOOD thing…

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