Tasteless but still funny


I’m not much of a clubber, but I was starting to get the hang of it.

They played “Jump Around” and I jumped around, they played “Put Your Hands Up” and I did, everything seemed to be going well.

Then they played “Come On Eileen” and I got thrown out…



There’s an incest competition in my town this weekend.
I’m going to enter my sister.


Woman walks into a butcher shop.

“Sir are your chickens fresh?”

“Freshest in town madam.”

“Let me see one.”

Butcher hands her a chicken. She spreads the legs puts her nose down in there and sniffs.

“Doesn’t smell that fresh to me”

“Lady, could you pass that test?”


My penis was in the Guiness book of world records…
But then the librarian kicked me out



Why can’t dyslexic people tell jokes?

Because they always punch up the fuck line.


I refused to believe I was gay and dyslexic.
I was in Daniel.


How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.



Don’t you hate it when you’re driving along smoking a cigarette, you flick it out the window and you drive for a couple more miles and smell something funny and you look over onto the back seat and sure enough…
Grandma’s fingering herself again.






I had a breakthrough today and got in touch with my inner self.
That’s the last time I use cheap toilet paper.



My dad was so Competitive that on his death bed, as he breathed his last
He said, "Staring contest… GO.”




You say that like it was a GOOD thing…