There is an old joke I only have the vaguest memory of, something about a bus rider on a bus with no facilities having to take a dump…and then later on a couple homeless guys on a corner, one says to the other, hey look check it out, you slap his face I’ll grab the Cigar! (The homeless may be been person’s of color)
Honestly, if you have to take a dump and there’s nowhere to do it, you’re going to drop your trousers wherever you are. Yes, even you.
So a business man leaves the airport and gets in a cab to go to his sales meeting.
Along the way, a number two sneaks up on him.
He tells the cab driver to pull over so he can use a rest room, but the cab driver tells him there is no way he wants to get out in this section of town to do anything.
After they travel a bit, the man asks the driver how long it would be before they could stop. The driver says ten minutes. The man says he can’ wait that long. The driver tells the man to drop his pants, hang his butt out the window, and let it fly. So the man does.
It smacks two men in the face.
“Jesus, this is some weird tasting tobacco.”
“Forget about that. Did you see the lips on that sucker?!?!”
I was driving along the highway between the coast and the Valley onetime, and I don’t know why but I had to pee, like right fucking now! I knew there wasn’t a rest area or store or anything for quite a ways, and it got so bad I just pulled over on the shoulder of the road and stood over on the passenger side and let it rip convinced something horrible would happen, nope nothing happened, other than some semi truck tooted its horn at me.
LOL… that’s like every day for me.
I was on a dirt road in the middle of nowhere in Portugal when it happened to me.
Have I ever mentioned the time that I pooped off of a bridge?
Yeah, but I would find a building to do it next to, that way I would only be half neked. Maybe a bush would work. I would not do it in the middle of the road like I have seen pictures of in San Francisco; that is just plain uncivilized.
I used to run in the morning. Sometimes my warm up routine would not get my bowels going, so I would have to take a massive shit partway through the run.
One day I knew I couldn’t make it back home. I ran around this lake that was surrounded by developments, but there were some bits of trees around that offered semi privacy. So I went behind one, dropped my shorts, squatted, and let her rip. I kept a lookout at the development above me to make sure no one wandered into my field of view.
I got done with my business, came out from behind the tree, and not 15 feet from me was this old woman and her granddaughter (unless she kidnapped the kid.)
Her eyes were bugged out at me. I just smiled, said good morning, and continued my run.
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So, you’re no better than the Occupy folks.
I don’t think the occupy people willfully and wantonly exposed themselves to innocent Children, leaving them scarred for life.
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I don’t want to pick your pocket. I’m infinitely better than the Occupy deadbeats.
Yup, The pedophilia is despicable.
He must be a Muslim.
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He displays all the symptoms.
It’s funny what arouses you.
You’re the perv lurking around in the woods naked by trails where women and children walk, you sick fuck.
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It’s pervy to have to take a shit? Seriously, what brings on your O face is fucked up.
When I was a young one the powers that be tried to put in pay toilets. That really pissed me off(punny huh?) and I got the idea of squirting glue into the locks. I didn’t have to, other people beat me to the punch.
It can be tricky trying to figure out a routine coordinating early morning exercise, eating and pooping.