Watch the man behind this petite woman.
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Look ma, The Coronas canāt get past this!
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Mom, Iām bored.
Why donāt you, Bobby and Mikey go fool around in my bedroom.
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One-liner dump, sorry for the repeats
- Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem.
- I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like Iām cracking a safe.
- I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
- Still havenāt decided where to go for Easter ----- The Living Room or The Bedroom
- PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
- Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.
- I donāt think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks weād go from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone
- This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dogā¦ we laughed a lot.
- So, after this quarantineā¦will the producers of My 600 Pound Life just find me or do I find them?
- Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.
- My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.
- Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.
- Iām so excited ā itās time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?
- I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyarda. Iām getting tired of Los Livingroom.
- Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.
- Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said āI hope I donāt have the same teacher next yearāā¦ Iām offended.
- Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under
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The amount of bad Coronavirus jokes are starting to reach worrying numbers.
Some scientists claim it might become a pundemic.
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Today, I scored TP gold!
Six-pack, mega rolls, for $5.25.
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Holy shit! So was that like a single ply, or what?
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Today I was also able to score eggs, frozen & fresh fruit & veggies, pastaā¦ and thereās TP (cheap-ass 1- and 2-ply) to be had tho we had our cubby for that full of the good stuff before this even became a thing. Blood orange season is also producing late this year, no complaints from me.
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Double.
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Noice!
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